Is it possible to choose how you feel or are emotions completely automatic?

Question

People sometimes tell me I am choosing to be unhappy or that I should just decide to feel differently. This infuriates me because I do not feel like I have control over my emotions. But part of me wonders if they have a point. Can you actually choose how you feel?

willow_gray · Accepted Answer

You cannot choose the initial emotion but you can influence how long it lasts and what you do with it. The first feeling is automatic. The second thought, the interpretation, the story you tell yourself, that is where choice becomes possible.

madelyn_foster · Answer

Telling someone to just choose to feel differently is usually unhelpful and sometimes cruel. Emotions serve functions and dismissing them does not make them go away. Working with emotions is more effective than trying to override them.

Is it possible to choose how you feel or are emotions completely automatic?

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Is it possible to choose how you feel or are emotions completely automatic?

2 answers Most votes Newest Oldest

Write an Answer

2 answers
Most votes Newest Oldest